Sunday, January 25, 2009

The Unexpected # 222

Writers: Arnold Drake, B.S. Watson, Mark Pasko, Robert Kanigher
Artists: Tor F. Infante, Michael Clark, John Celardo, Mark Silverstri, Keith Giffen
Publisher: DC
Published: May 1982

Another odd one today.

The opening story has a father who is a widow. Him and his wife, Linda had problems conceiving. However, one mysterious night Linda wakes up smelling lilacs. Going back to sleep they think nothing of it. Later she ends up becoming pregnant and during the child's birth Linda ends up dying. The child is named Miracle, and she goes on to live a childhood full of abuse by her peers and being raised by a father who never speaks her name. She is picked on because she is permanently bald, and her father blames her for Linda's death. One day while driving back from Linda's grave, they both smell lilacs. Immediately after smelling them a spaceship lands. They stop, and aliens approach them. Miracle takes off her wig, and the aliens announce they are here to pick up their child. Turns out the aliens can't conceive, so they impregnate earth women. The aliens take their child, and as a thank you they return a cloned version of Linda. The husband is overjoyed and finally says his child's name, but only in reference to saying "goodbye."

More like: "Goodbye Miracle, thanks for nothing. Oh and thank you aliens for killing my first wife and then returning a cloned copy that won't have any of the memories or personality that I fell in love with. Thanks again!"

Damn aliens, think they can do anything....

The second tale is a one page story of aliens deciding us humans are doing all right for ourselves as they observe some folks buying stuff at a local department store.

The third tale has a vampire on the loose. After preying upon his victims he calls the local police department, so that his victims won't die. The cops eventually track the vampire down and find out he is the brother to the head detective, and in life the vampire was a priest.

Finally the last tale has Alexander the Great on his quest to conquer the known world. At the height of his power, he dies, but is not given a coin to pay the toll to cross the river Styx. So in life, he was a king of kings, but in death he is nothing more than a lost soul who can't pay the price for a decent afterlife. Deep...

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