Marvel Holiday Special 1991

Writers: Scott Lobdell, Walter Simonson, Steven Grant, Tom DeFalco, Len Kaminski, Howard Mackie, Danny Fingeroth
Artists: Dave Cockrum, Art Adams, Klaus Janson, Sal Buscema, Ron Lim, John Herbert, Dennis Jensen, Ron Garney
Publisher: Marvel
Published: December 1991

Oh won't you take me to Christmas Town?! (to the tune of Funky Town)

I gots another Marvel Holiday Special on the go. Now, I swear I don't mean to keep forcing the ol' Marvel down peoples gullets, but I don't seem to have too many DC Christmas comics. The new one that was just released looked pretty cool, with the cover by Frank Quitely, but I couldn't justify paying $6 US for basically just the cover. I'll wait a bit, bit if a certain someboyd is reading this post, hint hint....wait, I change my mind, I'd rather a Raphael TMNT toy, that is based off the original Eastman & Laird TMNT comics from the 80's. Now that I mention it, a couple of months back I was down at the Silver Snail in Toronto, and I overheard some guy say that the TMNT toys designs were based off a Ninja Turtle video game. I privately snickered and laughed at his lack of mutant turtles knowledge...no I'm not a loser...

Today's issue has the X-Men in search of the most powerful mutant Cebero has ever detected: Kris Kringle. Yep, you heard it here first, Santy is a mutant of the highest order, but without that whole persecution complex most muties seem to have. Another tale has Franklin of the FF finding the true meaning of Christmas and releasing Scrooges old business partner Marley from his chains. Another tale that stood out was the one with a blind kid being rescued by Ghost Rider and returned to his parents. If I remember correctly, there were a lot of bad comics being done in the early 90s, but Ghost Rider was one of the few that really kicked ass. I mean it doesn't get much better than a bad ass biker with a skull on fire handing out penance stares like candy.
The remaining issue has some cute stories involving Punisher punishing, Captain America finding Bucky's long lost sister, Spidey and Jonah mixing it up, Thor verily doing his whole Thor thing, and Captain Ultra doing...wait, who the hell is Captain Ultra? Probably the most interesting chapter of this issue was one page where the folks at Marvel created their own lyrics to popular songs, like Jingle Bells, 12 Days of Christmas, and Vogue. I've taken the liberty of posting the lyrics to "Rogue" (to the tune of Vogue)

Look around, everywhere you turn they're mutants
They're everywhere that you go, look around
They will try everything they can to escape
the pain of life that they know as super heroes
Christmas time, they all long to be
hanging up mistletoe.
I know a mutant who must stay away.
A kiss would be kind, but she'll steal your mind.
They call her...
(Refrain)
Rogue, Rogue,

Get away from the mistletoe
A no no! Come on Rogue
get your powers under control
You know you can do it.

All you need is your own determination.
So use it. That's what it's for. That's what it is for.
Holidays, make you want to reach out to them.
ou'll leave 'em feeling sore. Feeling very sore.
It makes no difference if they're bad or good.
If they're a boy or girl.
It contact's made them unfortuantly.
You'll steal their powers and memories.
Just stop it.

(Refrain)

Lonra Dane and Domino. Psylocke and Ororo
Professor X, Scott and Jean, no one comes between.
You see Wolverine, on the cover of all magazines
Alysande, Alistaire, Archangel's dance on air.
They have style, they have grace.
Watch Mystique change her face.
Phoenix, Meggan, Kitty, too. Alan Davis we love you.
Mutants with attitude.
Christmas puts them in the mood.
Deck the halls. Let's get to it.
One X-Man can never do it.

Check the Batmobile toy Thing got from Santy. I had the same toy as a kid!