Archie: The "Masked Marvel"

Writer/Artist: Unknown
Publisher: Archie Comics
Published: 1999 (original date: unknown)

I normally wouldn't post 2 Archie comics in one week, but after reading this one I had to get it out to the fans!

Archie is wearing a monster mask to school, and is insulted that people recognize him right away.

Betty remarks that the guys are doing this to boost their attractiveness, by taking of the mask and in comparison, they look much better. Veronica thinks the girls are too smart for this gimmick...but maybe she's mistaken:


Proving Veronica wrong, Archie corners a young damsel, and scares her into a date for Saturday night.


Betty and veronica assure the young lady that no date made under threat is legitimate, but the girl insists she must go. Veronica then asks why she was so scared when it was obviously Archie under the mask.


The young lady responds by removing her face and revealing a BIG GIANT EYE!



Oh, it's just Eyeda! Yuk yuk yuk...!! Too bad for Archie!
And the moral of the story is: don't scare women into having dates with you. You just may date a girl with a GIANT MONSTER EYE FOR A FACE! At least dinner will be cheap!

Archie: The Dream Shop!

Writer: Unknown (unless it is Harry Lucey)
Artist: Harry Lucey
Publisher: Archie Comics
Published: Unknown

I would be sorely amiss I didn't include an Archies tale in my blog. I thought I'd include one my favorite tales: "The Dream Shop!"

The story opens with Archie in a dream (see left panel - my favorite line is: " How can one man be so desirable?" I have to deal with that same sentiment day-in-day-out...sigh...). After waking from his dream, Archie visits the local dream shop where he meets this old man:






Archie is sold a dream, which makes Archie so desirable, even Veronica is willing to die just so she can be with him. However, Archie just can't 'play favorites' and leaves Veronica moping. As Archie drives off he is suddenly floored by a sidewalk blond bombshell: Betty Cooper!






Betty is now the most desirable thing Archie has ever seen! After some major begging, Betty relents and slams a hard kiss on Archie!


Turns out, Betty bought that last dream for him. Up next is a dream Jughead bought for Archie. As can be expected, it's just good ol' fun less any crazy girls.


The tale ends with Archie returning to the shop, only to have it nowhere to be found. Archie is pissed, while Betty and Jughead are left to figure out why Archie is in such a mood.



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