Archie: The Dream Shop!

Writer: Unknown (unless it is Harry Lucey)
Artist: Harry Lucey
Publisher: Archie Comics
Published: Unknown

I would be sorely amiss I didn't include an Archies tale in my blog. I thought I'd include one my favorite tales: "The Dream Shop!"

The story opens with Archie in a dream (see left panel - my favorite line is: " How can one man be so desirable?" I have to deal with that same sentiment day-in-day-out...sigh...). After waking from his dream, Archie visits the local dream shop where he meets this old man:






Archie is sold a dream, which makes Archie so desirable, even Veronica is willing to die just so she can be with him. However, Archie just can't 'play favorites' and leaves Veronica moping. As Archie drives off he is suddenly floored by a sidewalk blond bombshell: Betty Cooper!






Betty is now the most desirable thing Archie has ever seen! After some major begging, Betty relents and slams a hard kiss on Archie!


Turns out, Betty bought that last dream for him. Up next is a dream Jughead bought for Archie. As can be expected, it's just good ol' fun less any crazy girls.


The tale ends with Archie returning to the shop, only to have it nowhere to be found. Archie is pissed, while Betty and Jughead are left to figure out why Archie is in such a mood.



More Comix 365 articles:  

Harley Quinn

Spidey Super Stories

X-Statix # 11: Introducing El Guapo!

Writer: Peter Milligan
Artists: Mike Allred/Laura Allred
Publisher: Marvel
Published: August 2003

X-Statix is one of my favorite series Marvel put out in the last decade or so. These heroes more concerned about saving people for television ratings sake than goodness sake.

Issue # 11 introduces Robbie Rodriguez aka "El Guapo" aka "The Handsome One" to the team. He has been brought on to boost drama amongst the team. He rides a mystical skateboard.


During a recruitment party, Robbie is sent into action with the team. Being a bit drunk, he slams head first into a tree. Exit stage left.


After, Robbie has a heart to heart with his girlfriend on whether to join X-Statix. He decides it'll be great for him and her, and they'll see each other whenever they can.


All seems well until, fame, money, and attention get the better of El Guapo.


Too bad for him Doop records everything.


Too bad for El Guapo his skateboard doesn't approve of his cheating ways, and gives him a lesson in skate justice.


Welcome to X-Statix.

Superman # 50

Writer: Jerry Ordway

Artists: Dan Jurgens, Brett Breeding, Kerry Gammill, Dennis Janke, Curt Swan, John Byrne, Jerry Ordway

Publisher: DC

Published: December 1990

Happy V-Day!

I thought that Superman 50 would be the best comic for this day. This is the one where Superman/Clark Kent finally 'officially' hooks up with Lois Lane. It's a 48 page SPECTACULAR, filled with action, humor, drama,...but lets get to the point. The cover states: "You will NOT believe the last page!" so to save you folks some time, check it out:

That just happened. Now check this:

Supes puts his pants on one leg at a time - just like us!

Love Diary

Writers/Artists: unknown but the cover has Dick Giordano credited
Publisher: Charlton Comics
Published: November 1962

One day before V-Day!

Here's an oldie. This issue has a few tales with very little differences between plot: couple fall in love, try to solidify their love but are stopped either by doubt, fear, parents, or circumstance, but in the end get together. Check some scans and you'll see what I mean:


What I don't get about these old romance stories is the preoccupation with depicting vanilla love. Why are all the characters white? Don't get me wrong here, I'm no racist (that I know of anyway), but I think it is a bit limiting that the characters don't mix it up as it were. That's one thing that always bugged me about the Archie comics. Archie could chase after Midge, Veronica, Cheryl or Betty, but Chuck could only chase after Nancy.

This exact situation reminds me of when I saw Snake and Joey from Degrassi the TV show giving a talk at UNB. I remember them saying that when the show started to air the show down in the USA, the number one complaint from parents were not the episodes concerning suicide, abortion, or so on, but when BLT dated Michelle, because he was black and she was white.

Well, I guess that's just another aspect of love: stupidity.

New Love # 1

Writers/Artists: Jaime & Gilbert Hernandez
Publisher: Fantagraphics
Published" August 1996

I'm new to the world of Love and Rockets, but from what I have read, it's pretty cool. The artwork looks great, and stories are interesting and 'life filled.' New Love has 2 stories and a couple strips attached.

The first tale has Venus getting in trouble for reading a porn comic. The second tale has this weird creepy guy trying to help his 'love.' His love happens to be a mob mistress, and to help her he has to stare into the depths of death (as far as I can figure). Each time he looks he has to stare longer and longer to get help from death. This subsequently causes him great harm. The story ends with his mother dead, and his love willing to follow him. To where, no idea: she just says she's going with him.

So, sticking to my love analogies, sometimes love means staring into the depths of death, and not knowing what the hell is going on. That and porn comics are not for minors.

The Walking Dead # 3

Writer: Robert Kirkman
Artist: Tony Moore
Publisher: Image Comics
Published: December 2003

What's Valentines Day without jealousy, envy, and feelings of murder and desperation?

Zombies have taken over the world. Everyday is a struggle to survive. All you want to do is carve out a life for you and the ones you care about; and the one you really care about is a wife with a MIA husband.

Too bad for you, her husband has waltzed back into the picture and has advised her everything is going to be alright.

But it's not.

Marvel Romance Redux # 1: But I Thought He Loved Me!

Writers: Jeff Parker, John Buscema, Roger Langridge, John Lustig, Stan Lee, Jimmy Palmiotti, Keith GiffenArtists: John Romita Sr., Dick Giordano, Vinny Colletta, Jack Kirby, Gene Colan, Jim Mooney

Publisher: Marvel

Published: April 2006

Another Marvel Romance Redux review. Similar to the last one I posted, this one has re-scripted stories to the old romance comics Marvel used to publish. I found this one to be better than the Guy's & Doll's issue. First off the artwork has Jack Kirby and John Romita Sr. doin' their thing. I find Romita's penciling of his female leads to be a bit more alluring than Kirby's. Kirby has a squarish face design to his characters which sometimes has his females looking a little manly. That being said, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and all that jazz...

The first tale is about a stripper who is also President of the USA, and the second is about a girl being ashamed of her tattoos. The third tale is about guns and relationships. The fourth tale is about marriage and not wanting it, and finally the last tale is a hit gone awry.

There you have it, a review that clearly show's I'm not trying, but much like romance, sometimes a person doesn't want to bother trying.

Swamp Thing # 34

Writer: Alan Moore
Artists: Stephen Bissette & John Totleben
Colorist: Tatjana Wood
Publisher: Vertigo Comics
Published: March 1985

Issue 34 of Swamp Thing is the psychedelic love song of comics.

After Abby is rescued from the clutches of Hell by Swamp Thing, the two of them are resting in the Louisiana swamps. After some brief conversation she proclaims her love for him, and thus begins the weirdest, bizarre, (maybe illegal), love sequences in comic history. Because of his nature (as in he is a plant), Swamp Thing is unsure that sex between the two of them would possible. Instead he produces a tuber that she eats and this creates a psychic/spiritual connection between the two which allows Abby and Swamp Thing to 'bond'. The issue ends with a romantic kiss between the two, with Swamp Thing in bloom.

I must admit, I love this issue to no end. First off, the art is fantastic. I really liked the way the artists drew flowers and tubers growing on Swamp Thing. The panels where Abby and Swamp Thing are merged are trippy and unique, which further highlights their unusual but deeply committed love. Second off, as for the story, all I can say is leave it to Alan Moore to create something this outlandish and gross (yet romantic). I guess as only Moore knows, sometimes the best love is weird, monstrous, and tuber-induced.

Batman Adventures: Mad Love

Writers: Paul Dini, Bruce Timm
Artist: Bruce Timm
Publisher: DC
Published: 1994

Keeping with my theme of romance and Valentines day et cetera, I had to get this one on Comix 365. Mad Love by Timm and Dini is one of those 64 page extravaganzas, but unlike most of em', this one actually is entertaining from beginning to end.

The story opens with Batman foiling another one of Joker and Harley Quinn's plans. Joker doesn't take kindly to the foul up and he ends up taking his frustration out on Harley Quinn and tosses her out on the street. Quinn, being the love-sick puppy she is, blames Batman and not the Joker. The story then journeys back into Harley Quinns past when she was 'normal'.

All Harley wants is to grow old with her lover-clown, so to get back in his good books, she plans to do something the Joker has yet to achieve: kill the Batman! And she almost succeeds! You can just imagine how Joker takes this!

He tosses her out of a window is how he takes it. Poor Harley! The issue ends with Joker foiled again and Harley back in Arkham. You'd think that after being beaten, humiliated, abused, and nearly killed by the Joker she would have enough sense to leave him, but sometimes when in love a person can be a little mad. Sorry...had to!

X-Factor # 61 (Part 6 of The X-Tinction Agenda)

Writer: Louise Simonson
Artists: Jon Bogdanove, John Caponigro
Publisher: Marvel
Published: December 1990

Anyone remember X-tinction Agenda? If not a quick recap: the country of Genosha with the aid of Cameron Hodge (a crazy psycho cyborg) have declared war on mutants. A bunch of mutants have been captured and have had their mutant powers blocked. Hodge tortures the mutants forcing them to fight one another. One battle had Wolverine and Archangel forced to fight, where Wolverine is left badly injured. He is tossed into a cell.

This issue picks up with Jean Grey and Cable being tossed into cells as well. Hodge has Jean Grey placed in the same cell as Wolverine. As everyone knows, Wolvie has always had a major krush on Jean. His love for Jean is just another tragedy in his life, as Jean is loyally in love with Cyclops and can never return his love. Now that he's dying (because his healing factor is being blocked) Jean is drawn to him and able to bring some comfort to his life.

There have been many Wolverine and Jean Grey moments in X history, but I always remember this one as being particularly poignant.

Marvel Romance Redux # 1: Guys & Dolls

Writers: Jeff Parker, Jim Starlin, John Lustig, Don Heck, Zeb Wells, Jean Thomas, Jimmy Palmiotti, Stan Lee, Frank Tieri
Artists: Jack Abel, Vinny Colletta, Gene Colan, Bill Everett, John Buscema, John Romita Sr., Frank Giacoia
Publisher: Marvel
Published: May 2006

It's that time of year again: Black History Month. Finally Chocolate City has become a reality. Nice.

Oh - also Valentines Day is fast approaching.

Here's a comic with romance on the agenda. Marvel's Romance Redux is equal parts an ode to the past and a satirical send up. Marvel has dug deep into the vault, dredging up the old romance comics of yesteryear and re-scripting the stories.

The first tale involves a witch who falls prey to a Diner Demon, and the second tale involves money and relationships. The third tale has a woman in love twisting her true nature, and the fourth involves forbidden love. Finally the last story has a star being born.

I found this issue pretty good. The new scripts were funny, and complemented the art quite well. I especially liked the issue involving the Diner Demon. The lead female character was a witch who was falling in love with a guy who only thought of food. Kinda reminded me of Carl Weathers when he was guest starring on Arrested Development.

The art is fantastic and even though the stories lack the original script it is pretty easy to figure out the original plot for most of these stories. They usually involve a lonely or unhappy girl who meets a man, falls in love, under goes some sort of drama, then it all wraps up with a kiss or the girl is still lonely. It seems like a lot of these old stories were all about finding a mate or your doomed to unhappiness, which I guess is what Valentines Day is all about!